<h3>How can I be ready for parenting someday?</h3>First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in the baby carriage. Have you heard that saying before?&nbsp;That statement is a societal belief about the appropriate sequence of key life events. The belief is that children are better off when their parents love each other and are in a happy healthy marriage before they’re born. What do you think about the statement? Is it outdated?Let’s keep going. What about the following statements? Do you agree or disagree with them? <a href="/contact-us">Tell us why or why not</a>.&nbsp;<ol><li>You should be finished with school and in a career before becoming a parent.</li><li>Two people should be in a healthy, committed relationship such as marriage and living in the same home before having children.</li><li>Having a child with someone is a good way to show them that you really love them.</li><li>People should get all of their young people's stuff out of the way so they can be a parent.</li><li>Both the mother and the father should contribute to the financial support of their children.</li></ol>

What family structure do you envision for your future? What lessons from your childhood do you want to carry forward? You have choice, flexibility, and balance to make those decisions.&nbsp;Commitment is about choice. Family is a choice for adults, but not for a child. Whenever you have sex that could result in pregnancy you may not be making a choice to have a child, but you are making a choice to be responsible for a child if you make one.&nbsp;So, although class, race, and what you’re born into aren’t choices or decisions we can make when we’re born into a family, having a child is a choice—even if you didn’t intend to have one.&nbsp;Think about these key events. Should they happen in this order before you have a kid? <a href="/contact-us">Give us your thoughts</a>.&nbsp;<ol><li>Graduate from high school</li><li>Graduate from college / trade school</li><li>Start a career</li><li>Travel to new places</li><li>Get your own place&nbsp;</li><li>Fall in love</li><li>Get married / enter a committed relationship</li></ol>Raising kids is a full-time—and expensive—job. Having things in place, whether it’s finishing <a href="/resources/nyp-complete-education">school</a> and starting a career or being in a committed relationship, will make your parenthood journey easier. Or if you decide to have a kid but not stay in a relationship with your child’s other parent, you need to figure out how you’re going to co-parent together, become your child’s <a href="/resources/yp-become-legal-parent" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">legal parent</a>, and <a href="/resources/nyp-child-support-program">pay</a> child support.Ultimately, it’s about breaking the cycle of poverty, violence, and addiction, so your future child can have a better, more economically flexible childhood.

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